Tuesday, January 10, 2012

The miserable feeling

Dear blog,

I don't like the feeling and emotion that im having right now. It's make me unable to concentrate on my task. Keep on playing in my mind, really wanted to have the answer for all my inquiries, and chase away all the uncertainty that make me feel miserable. Honestly, I really wish to know the answer. But im scare though of the answer that i''ll get in the end. It is just i don satisfied! How i wish if i could get the answer i want and make me feel secure. Somehow it dint. Only if he know how i really feel and can respond to me. Though I guess he somewhat know how i felt, and told me distance and time as obstacle. I know there are actually another person in his heart too, but by allowing me to venture to his world has gave me some courage to pursue my feeling. I just know that in the end, i'll be the one that hurt most as i hitting the wall even though i realize the wall just right in front of me. I actually been wondering why he treating me this way. I'm trying to resist myself, but i give in eventually just because i couldn't resist my own feeling. Should i confront with him o how i really feel and get the answer right away? Or let this feeling remain unrevealed till i regret it some day. Im really don like the feeling of uncertain and incomplete. How i wish he would call me and tell me how he feel, and give a solution to me. I rather he stop me now, than making my heart pondering without the shore that i could land.

It's been long I din't have this kind of feeling. And now it appear again. Perhaps there are still a part of myself wanted to love someone and being love.


love

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